Our first Featured Book Friday is celebrating an 826LA Publication, This is my Revolution. This book was written by the 2014-2015 9th grade Ethnic Studies students at Roosevelt High School.
By identifying community assets and analyzing root causes of oppression, students reimagined their realities through writing about themselves and life in Boyle Heights. This collection of honest and inspirational stories depicts the power of transformation and healing that comes from knowledge of self. Every author expresses urgency and agency for change to reimagine the future.
Cover by: Nico Avina
Designed by: Diana Molleda
“The Story Behind My Smile,” a poem written by Arianna L., is an excerpt from the book. Follow the link below to purchase the full book and support 826LA.
The Story Behind My Smile
We’ve all been through so much
Trust me I know the struggles you have been through
I fake a smile every single day just to show I’m not hurting
Dad’s been on disability for a couple of months
We are getting about a grand every couple of months
It’s sad to see how bad we have been struggling
But yet there’s nothing I can really do
Besides sit back and “not worry about it”
Mom’s bringing in whatever she can
Getting paid about 400 dollars per month
Sister just moved out
She can’t even look me in the eyes or even say hi
We are on a rocky type of road right now
But will it all get better?
Both of us don’t do anything to fix the situation
But I’m not going to bow down to her wrongdoings
Momma and Pops arguing in the next room
It’s like living through a never-ending war
Last week Dad was out
Him hugging me
Me crying in his arms questioning myself if I can get through this alone
You all ask me how I do it, but I don’t have an answer
Did you really want to put me through this, Dad?
You say you want to protect me but all you’re really doing is tearing me down
Dad’s a wannabe G
Reppin a hood he doesn’t even belong to
It’s as if he hasn’t grown up yet
I tell him to grow up but he says he knows what he’s gotta do
I’m lost and confused
And my fuse is running out too
I really don’t know what to do
I’m just trying to make things right
Momma’s a smoker
Smoking those Camel Crush cigarettes
As I watch her lungs slowly die out
She walks to the liquor with fifty cents in her hand just to go buy a single
I asked her to stop but she said I’m not her mother
They say it’s her stress reliever
But is it really
Or are they just running?
Praying to my Grandma up above to help me make these things right
Asking her to give me strength to get through this
Family is supposed to be tight but instead they’re not trying to make it right
Arguments over the stupidest reasons
But I can’t say anything cause I have no right
I love my parents to death but I don’t know what do do
I’m a fifteen-year-old girl that’s stuck in between loving and hating herself
I don’t know what do do
Parents both arguing
Sister doesn’t talk to me
Family making up stuff
Who can I run to?
What can I do besides fake a smile and act like it doesn’t affect me
So many questions running through my mind
But I still don’t know what to do
Trying to hold it all in but it’s’ not working
I love my parents to death but is it really worth me trying to better things
They don’t see how bad I’ve been hurting
And they will never see it
Purchase “This is My Revolution”
